The Healing Journey
I used to think that when I asked for healing from my emotional pain, that I was going to “achieve” that by fixing myself and everything that was ultimately wrong with me.
The Process
These past few weeks have been very up and down for me. I have come face-to-face with my crumbling confidence as well as grief over where and how things have landed for me thus far. Not that it’s bad, but sadness is present nonetheless. And within all of this, I had a moment that brought me full circle. I was broken down and in tears when I felt this sense of light take hold deep in my bones - grief is the portal to every major transformation. And I was clearly being asked to let the transformation take place. I will honestly say that I am still within that process and the pain that we can experience within transformations can feel overwhelming at times.
The Connection Between Grief and Gratitude
This time of year, with Thanksgiving right around the corner, there is a lot of talk about gratitude and feeling grateful. Cultivating gratitude within ourselves and our lives is a potent healer in times of loss and grief. However, I want to speak to something that may not be often shared. When we experience a great loss in our lives, there is a time when we cannot feel gratitude without feeling the grief. They feel tied together. Bonded by some unknown force.
Finding Peace: A Journey Through Grief
This past year has been one of the most difficult for me since my mom passed away almost a decade ago. It wasn’t that I lost someone to death but I lost someone through choosing to speak up about what I desired. Our desires did not match. And in that, the pain of rejection and choosing an ending was much harder than I imagined.
Letting go & Letting in
What a profound statement. What if we explored the concept of grief being something to let in. To be with. Where grief has a welcomed seat at our table. What if we didn’t have to try so hard to let go but rather just invited more of it in. Instead of pushing ourselves to move on, we move forward WITH the loss.
Invisible
One of the most difficult aspects of grief is that it can feel like an invisible weight you carry around. No one sees the immense pain you are in. Grief can feel very isolating and I feel this is partly why. A month or two after a devastating loss, we may “look” fine but on the inside we are unmoored.
The Dance Between
As cliche as it may sound, life really is a dance between the polarities of our world, our reality. We are an embodiment of that polarity and the dance between. We breathe in and we breathe out.
Take Time to Honor
Take time to honor and be present with the life you are living and the life living through you.